Every Year or So

Well it's been since August of last year that I posted. Time's ripe to post again, I suppose. I read a lot of blogs, a lot. Whenever I discover a new blog that I like, I absolute MUST go back in the archives and read from the beginning. I like to know where all these little jokes and references are coming from, how the person has changed and grown since they started posting, etc. The downside to this is when I am all caught up and have read all posts to the present I am instantly annoyed that the next post is not easily available and I must wait a week or whatever for the next installment. Le sigh. This frustration inevitably leads me to flit about on the internet and find a new blog or zine to obsess over and greedily read.

Work has really been trying my patience lately. I have felt underappreciated, stupid, and just generally frustrated for the last month or so. And I hate talking to work people about it to try and get the problem fixed because I can't help but sound like a whiny bitch. "No one liiiiiistens to me!!!" I can't win. It has definitely started to affect my job performance. I absolutely dread coming in every day and usually do nothing all day unless I absolutely must. We have had meeting after meeting that have been thinly veiled discussions about how I can do my job better. The meeting inevitably turns in to this:
Them: "You know what you could do in the future? This and this."
Me: "I already do that."
Them: "But do you do it like this?"
Me: "Yes."
Them: "But do you do it like this and this?"
Me: "I used to, but the last time I did it like that you told me to not do it like that anymore."
Them: "I see."
You know what would make the job you do much better and more efficient? If you do this thing that you already do but I don't notice. It has taken every ounce of willpower I have to not snap and start strangling people in these meetings. My boss and his boss pulled me in and had a little pow wow to ask why I'd been so visibly upset for the last two weeks or so. I was able to air all of my frustrations and why I was upset, which helped a lot. Well see how much good it does. Just yesterday a 60-year-old man on the tech team acted like a petulant child when I told him I wasn't going to do what he asked me to do (I suggested a couple of alternatives and finally just told him I wasn't going to do what he wanted) and he said "FINE!" and stormed away like he was 6. SERIOUSLY. What the fuck. When I went over to his cubicle to iron things out I said, "You can't just storm away like that! We're not going to get anything accomplished." He said, "I can and I did." REALLY?! What is wrong with you?! Ugh. I have slight OCD tendencies and easily obsess over things; thus, I have been playing this sequence of events over and over in my head and just getting angrier and angrier. I want to scold this man like I am his mother and he is the naughty child he's acting like.